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Activities for Grieving Children
September 14, 2021
Memory Jars
Sometimes it may be difficult for children to talk about their feelings about the loss of loved one. One way to help them to express what they feel is by creating a memory jar. The process helps them to think about happy memories while creating something to help them remember their loved one.
The following instructions create a jar layered with different coloured salt and chalk to trigger different memories. You might prefer to mix the salt with powdered paint instead. You can choose to add objects to the jar that have significant meanings. The end result will be a way of remembering a special person and will allow children an opportunity to communicate their feelings.
To Make it:
• 1. Gather together a glass jar with a lid, a pen, salt, coloured chalks, felt tip pens and six sheets of A4 paper
• 2. Carefully fill the jar with salt and place to one side.
• 3. On a piece of paper write down any five things you remember about the person who died
• 4. Draw a dot of colour next to each memory (for example, blue for their favourite song, pink for a time you did something fun together).
• 5. Spread out five sheets of paper and split the salt from the jar between them
• 6. Colour each pile of salt with coloured chalk that corresponds to the dots for each memory. Do this by rubbing the chalk into the salt. Talk about the memory as throughout this process.
• 7. Carefully pour each pile of salt into the jar one at a time to create layers.
• 8. Gently tap the jar to settle the salt then fill up any remaining space with plain salt to prevent the layers mixing.
• 9. Put your jar somewhere you will see it often and keep your memory sheet safe so you can show it to friends and family.
Memory Boxes
This activity involves decorating and preparing items that are keepsakes and memories of the person who died. Items needed: a box (maybe a shoe box or similar), coloured paper, pencils, crayons, textas or whatever the child would like to decorate the box with. Then collect items that have meaning for the child and the person they lost – maybe photos, trinkets, and memorabilia such as ticket stubs etc. The child can decorate the box with whatever resources are available – perhaps tissue paper, drawings, pictures cut out from magazines. Place the collected items into the completed box. Talk with the child about the items they have chosen to include – what does each item represent or mean to them.
Helping children to express their feelings while creating a keepsake can be useful in opening up communication about the death of the loved one between care givers and children. It also encourages open discussion about death and feelings, and that its okay to talk about these things as they are a natural part of life.
Sometimes it can be difficult to know what to do for the best when talking to children about grief. The Southern Highlands Bereavement Care Service can provide resources, information and counselling for children and adolescents. For further information contact us on 48621701 or via email on [email protected]. To access our Youth Booklet (for adolescents and young adults) visit our website: shbcs.org.au to download a free copy today.