It is difficult watching friends and family grieve. It often leaves us feeling helpless and not knowing what to do to help. Everyone will grieve in their own way but below are some things that you can do to provide support:

Be there – don’t avoid the person and their loss.

Listen – one of the best things we can do is to listen to the person – without giving advice unless asked.

Let the person talk about their loss and the impact on their life. Encourage them to reminisce and tell stories about the person they have lost.

Involve the person in social activities whenever possible.

Offer practical help but don’t take over. This may be providing a meal, doing some shopping, mowing the lawn – be guided by them in what they need.

Be aware of your own needs and grieving.

Take note of any changes in behaviour that are out of character.

Encourage them to see their doctor for a check-up if needed.

Let them cry – allow the person to cry – this helps to release emotions.



Remember that it is important to let people handle things in their own way. Support them to do things for themselves where possible, encourage them to talk with friends, family, or someone they trust. This may include their doctor, a minister of religion or a counsellor.

Sometimes talking to someone outside of family and friends is helpful. The Southern Highlands Bereavement Service offers counselling and support to those who are grieving, and contact can be made via phone: on 48621701 or email: [email protected].

(Adapted from National Association for Loss and Grief NALAG brochure.)